Poem by Maria Dulce Leitão Reis
PRAYER (Conversation with God)
God the Father almighty, zealous and my friend
I ask you to keep me
This ability to believe, understand and love.
Even after so much bitterness and disappointment
Don’t let love, die in my heart!
Because I don’t want to lose
Discernment and sensitivity
To enjoy a ray of sun, a bird singing
A shooting star, a raindrop
A flourishing joy
An indigo morning, cool and serene
A dewy flower
The waves of the sea
The moon the sky and the thunderstorm …
All simple things that allow me to walk happy!
Don’t allow my Lord
May love die in my heart.
So that i can see in a friend, a brother
And in a brother, a friend.
So that my belief may remain intact
And don’t turn disbelief and mistrust.
For me to see hugs, faith, and alliance
And not clashes and stabs.
That I may see good Samaritans, not thugs.
So that I see peace and not kalashnikovs!
You know, my God I’m tired too.
Of being always ignored, devalued
As a proclaimed merchandise, in a gypsy tent
At the end of the market.
You know Father
Sometimes a fondness tastes good.
It hurts in the soul, in the heart
In the blood and in the bowels
We don’t know who we are.
But more than not knowing who we are
It is the affront of judging us as we are not.
And so it was all my existence
My gestures of kindness
They were seen as falsehood
Now it does not matter
I grew up and made a helmet of patience
Lined with tolerance.
I have hope in a better world.
More fair and equitable!
You wear my clogs
And walk the paths that I went through.
I strode and jolted
For hills and valleys, steppe savannas and plateaus
Weed, meadows and deserts.
I crossed rivers and seas, I jumped clouds and chasms
I faced sickness, pain and crying.
And nights and days without sleep ,
Praying the rosary …
I lost my girl dreams
Because I grew up in a hurry.
I lost the dreams of my youth
Looking for myself.
I lost my woman dreams
Annulling myself for others.
I always gave myself, without thinking about myself
And where did gratitude go?
It lived far away, while I was raped,
Humiliated and mistreated.
And in return, I always gave love
Love … what is love?
As if love were currency.
I guess sometimes I don’t even know
Because it is always accompanied by suffering.
And everything leads me to believe that I confuse them.
It isn’t old age, I have never distinguished them.
And now that I’m getting to the end of the road,
I’m sure that my soul and my heart
They have always been invisible …
Only you know how I am, Father.
Sometimes not even me!
But knowing you, that’s enough!
Because others, there the others …
Just come the defects carved into the body!
I know I have defects Father. Everybody has it.
But if you see that I am having difficulty improving,
Give me a hand, okay?
I am human, I cry and I laugh,
But I lost the instruction manual and so …
I take more time to rectify myself …
Now, God the Father, I only want light and peace.
To reach the last port …
Thy blessing, my Lord …
@Maria Dulce Leitão Reis